Satisfied.

I'm starting week 3 of unemployment. And as I begin this gorgeous Monday morning, I'm starting to realize just how satisfied I am with my life now. The sun is shining, there's a slight breeze and before it reaches an ungodly temperature this afternoon, I can sit and enjoy reading on my porch.

There are few things that really make me happy like a pretty day. When I worked in the newsroom, I didn't get enough of them. There are no windows in the newsroom, I never know if it's sunny, raining or sometimes, we'd look out at our tower cameras and find it was-- much to our surprise-- snowing. I've spent the past 5 years of my life like that. And now, there's a tremendous satisfaction in knowing that I'm free.

Granted, Matt still wants me to get a job. And really, I need a job. I abandoned my promising career in search of something greater... I still have no idea what that something is, but from this view, on my porch, I know it does not include serving a life sentence in a newsroom.

I did interview at Operation Christmas Child last week. For 2 hours and 15 minutes I sat and talked with a guy named Chris. It was a great conversation and great interview. If I don't get the job, at least I can say it was a positive experience... one that I've not had often since it was only my 2nd ever interview after college... I'll hear from them this week.

I am now a part of the public relations committee for Habitat for Humanity York County. The committee is just getting re-started. I created a press release last night for HFHYC and got an immense feeling of satisfaction in crafting something as simple as a release.

I just want to become a writer. I'm not asking for fame-- just enough money to get by... guess I'd better get at it... because what better way to start than with a beautiful day and a breeze.

unemployment.

I'm day 5 into unemployment. It's been pretty much what I expected. I wake up, I drink coffee in bed until I feel like getting a shower and cleaning/organizing my house. I'm kind of in a holding pattern. Samaritan's purse said I'd hear about the job I interviewed for by this week. So I'm kind of hesitant to apply for any other jobs at the moment.

Enough about jobs/work/lackofwork.

My parents and sister are coming up today for part of the weekend. Dad's going to drive a NASCAR around the track in concord... it was a birthday present-- because what ELSE do you get for the man who has everything and wants nothing? :)

Matt's little brother Nick is moving in this month. I've been cleaning/clearing our guest room so he can take over. It's a lot harder than I thought to condense 3 rooms into 2. We've piled my Jeep with stuff to take to Goodwill. It feels kind of therapeutic to clear it all out.

I realize the longer I'm unemployed the more boring my writing may become. *sigh*

done.

It's done. This week I turned in my notice to Channel 9. I handed it in and immediately felt this surge of power. A rush. I have not regretted it once. My coworkers all seem thrilled for my newfound happiness. I'm so glad I followed my heart.

So what now? That's a question I've been getting a lot. My boss sent a note to the newsroom making it sound like I'd accepted a paying job with my local habitat affiliate that I have been volunteering with. This is not the case and I'm fairly certain that she just said that to avoid having to tell people that I'd rather be unemployed than work in that dark dungeon any longer.

I want to write. For real. I want to write a book. I want to write for magazines. I want to volunteer even more for habitat. I want to take disaster training classes with the red cross and get deployed to help natural disaster victims who live hundreds of miles away. I want to give back to the world that has given so much to me.

Matt, while he is willing to support me financially, is not so keen on my idealism. He wants me to find a paying job that makes me happy. He is supporting me because not so long ago he was not happy with his job... and I backed him 100%. That's what we married folk do. We have each other's backs.

I have some potential freelance work. It involves linking myself to a former anchor who is known for outbursts of rudeness and complete disorganization... but hey, if it pays the bills...

Either way, I'm following my heart. I'm doing something that will open new doors. I will be happy. I won't eat 2 meals a day at my desk. I will have windows to look out of. I will go outside. I will bid goodbye to the profession that has claimed my eyesight and probably a good 10 years off my lifespan. My last day is the friday after Memorial day...

I may not be done with news for good. This may just be a break in the road. In a year, if I get the urge, my non-compete clause of my contract will be up and I can go any damn where I want to produce. Including our direct competition across town which is known for being a much more manageable work environment...

I'm pretty darn pleased with myself.

oh yeah, and I got an amazing new tattoo. It's a section of a stained glass window from a church where we stayed while cleaning up after Katrina. I am so proud of it. It reminds me of the love, trust and gratefulness between complete strangers during times of disaster. It reminds me to give back.